A BUDDHIST A PHYSICIST AND A BALLER
How fascinating that the notion behind basketball's enduring adage "Ball don't lie" is rooted in the beautiful, benign, belief that we exist in a karmic universe, where every truth receives validation. It's a belief in the Universal rule that a power beyond our collective consciousness is keeping score. Where justice is sometimes served immediately, but often in time and to always bring balance back to the natural order of life. With our skewed cultural understanding of this ancient Buddhist term we have consistently applied the word to have a negative connotation, e.g. "don't worry, karma will get 'em." But at its root the word simply means "action" and is more accurately a kin to Newton's Third Law of Motion; For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Tar Heel alumni, Rasheed Wallace first learned of this sacred universal truth from the "trash talking" pickup games he played in the streets of Philadelphia during the 1990's.
I'm not saying Rasheed is a physics genius drawing inspiration for his signature trash talking ways from Isaac Newton's age old Laws, but I'm not saying he's not, not tapping into a deeply spiritual universal law of justice by ordering the cosmos to regain balance within the confines of Madison Square Garden when he famously barked, "Ball don't lie!" and was ejected after being issued his second technical foul. Karma? Maybe, but if we go back to the origins it was actually February 2004 when the phrase first found the masses in printed commentary after LA Clippers forward Corey Maggette uttered the aphorism in a post game interview after Michael Redd missed 2 of his 3 free throws following a Maggette foul with .01 on the clock and the Clippers up 105-102. I feel compelled to mention this truth in part because Maggette happens to be my wife's favorite basketball player of all time, but for reasons beyond his karmic maxims or basketball skill. Let's just say while living in LA her nickname for the former Los Angeles star was "Corey Come-get-me." Anyway, it wasn't until 2012 that Rasheed cemented himself to the snide saying after being ejected versus the Suns in The Garden for bellowing "Ball don't lie" for all to hear after Goran Drajić missed the free throw given after Sheeds first technical foul. This second tech ushering him to the locker room but also into our hearts and collective consciousness for trademarking an endearing basketballism and reminding all that beyond sports there is a universal proverb we should all adhere to.
If you take "Ball don't lie" at its literal value then we are acknowledging that Ball always tells the truth. Does this mean that Ball is capable of spewing untruths but chooses not to share them? Moreover, where does Ball get the gall to act as judge, jury and adjudicator for right vs wrong in the realm of hoop? How was this mythical ability bestowed on a seemingly ordinary sphere of synthetic leather? Is it the players cooperative recognition to the hoop gods that allows this fabled dictum to come to fruition? We may never know.
Until then at least we have the commandments of “Ball Don’t Lie,” as established by Sheed, and they are as follows:
-If a foul call is disputed by the one cast as the guilty party, then the ball will have final say over whether the call was right or wrong. If the shooter misses one or both foul shots, the ball will be said to have told the truth and the call will be registered, in the minds of all that have seen the play, as unjust. It then behooves the wronged party to exclaim, with ferocious energy “Ball don’t lie!”
-The opposite also holds true. If, after a disputed foul call, the shooter hits all of his free throws, then we can say that the referee was indeed correct. Either that or the ball lied.
-Respect the game, don't call weak shit.
Weekly Recap:
Elite Eight action kicked off as "The Tournament" continued Tuesday night in the friendly confines of Desert Sage Academy with the (7)Killer Bees looking to sting (2) seed Santa Fe Style with a sneak attack and buzz home with an upset. But those stucco slingers were smooth as a diamond finish color coat from the tip as they smeared any bee looking to disrupt their perfect hawk and trowel work on this pink adobe mansion of a season. No scaffolding needed for big Oliver "Young" Fell as he was troweling the high corners with highly coordinated dunks and put backs for a game high 28pts. Cody "Him" Garcia was the master mixer, putting in exact ratios of sand, cement and lime as he served a heaping shovel full of 20 ball with 19rebs and 6 dimes. TJ Sanchez was also on the job laying diamond lath like it was water, just missing a triple double (20/10/9). The honey making Killers did get some stellar nectar collecting from Derrick Carls' 24pts, 15rebs and 3 assists in the 70-103 blowout. Great season Killer Bees!
(3)Heatwave was surfing the spewing molten in the first half vs (6)Team Nuevo and their novel concept of an upset but it was a tale of two halves for Spaña's totally tubular bros as they went from Spicoli to spazz from downtown in the second stanza. After some tasty waves and a cool buzz netting 45 points behind a balanced offensive surge with Martin "Gracias" Gracia catching barrels and 18pts, the break ceased in the second half and flat water led to some similar shooting stats as the startup squad from Taos steadied the waters and pulled away, led by a fresh 34 Dom Baca points and a super efficient recent addition from Gabe Trujillo's 18pt, 5reb game. Team Nuevo 80, Heatwave 73. Thanks for the sweet vibes this season Heatwave!
The sum of all parts made this (1)505 Unit squad basically unbeatable Tuesday night as they brought a swarming entity and Angel Parra's triple double onslaught of 23pts, 17rebs and 10 dimes. Lukas "My Turn" Turner was dialing from long distance all game with a limitless calling card en route to a staggeringly efficient 42pts and 15rebs. Despite the 61-101 shellacking, the fast food bucket getting (9)Blakes Lottabuckets did get some spicy as a green chile cheeseburger shooting from Isaac "Adonis" Shanley, just missing his double meat double cheese feast with 26pts and 9rebs. Jeremy Romero had some success at the register making change with 14pts but "not alotta" business this night thanks to the multiple components of the 505. Thanks for a tasty seasoning this season Blakes!
The (4)Mob bosses were out enforcing every corner of their territory vs (5)Dad Bods to cap a clean night of playoff basketball, racking up the win 85-72 and making the Gambino family proud as they shared the hits. Dom Roybal (26pts) and Andrew "Uncle Drew" Ellsworth (24pts) went tommy gun crazy from the perimeter, while post players Ben "Big Ugly" Ellsworth (16/13) and Matt "Action" Jackson (14/15) handled the melee, clubbing any hairy backed double chin that dared try and bbq in the paint. Jerek Duda did lead the love handled beard growers with 18pts and Adam Montoya was as active as a dad on twin diaper duty with 15pts, 5rebs, 2 steals and a swat but that Thompson submachine gun was spraying darts as it hung out the getaway vehicle window into the sunset closing out our Elite Eight. Thanks for the phat season Dad Bods!
Norteño's gangster family was back in action vs the (1)505 Unit for finals night and through the first 20 minutes (4)Mob looked like they might steal the upset win as they went into halftime down just three, 41-44. But Lukas "My Turn" Turner's 31pts and those components of northern New Mexico put together a masterful second stanza that sent the mafia mobsters straight to offseason jail as they showed why they're the number one seed with an 89-74 dub. Angel Parra added 11/6/6 with a steal and a swat to help the area coded modules and Juan Ortiz found the cell service in time to call in 18pts to aid in the win. Mob got a clean three piece pinstripe suit performance from Matt "Action" Jackson as he was efficient with the smith and wesson going for 15/8/2 while smooth shooting Dom Roybal put together a 20 ball with 4rebs and 4 dimes but their getaway car found a deadend this night. Great season Mob!
Nobody was that surprised (6) seed and sleeper Team Nuevo was stepping up come tourney time but they had a brave new challenge on their hands going against the fired up chile roasters and that sweet smell that signifies the end of summer was wafting through the gym as (2)Santa Fe Style was roasting our beloved local veggie and newcomers to the court as they scorched the scoreboard hitting the century mark for a 100-73 win and a seat at the championship game. Chano "Chief" Herrera was tumbling chile and turning up the propane with a 30 ball (31) and 7rebs while TJ Sanchez was busy bushling sacks of blistered spice bombs as he got lit for 26pts, 12rebs and 6 dimes. New to this but true to this Gabe Trujillo was stellar in the loss with 16pts, 7rebs, 4 assists and 3 thefts and Josh Salazar found a recent copy of three ball in your eye as he sunk six to get his 20 ball modernized but in the end that Santa Fe spice was too much fire for the state-of-the-art specialists. Thanks for a wonderful season and tourney run Team Nuevo!
That set the stage for the game we all anticipated between (1)505 Unit vs (2)Santa Fe Style, signifying the third time these two juggernauts of the hardwood faced off this summer with 505 coming out winners on both previous occasions. But this is "The Tournament" where we throw out regular season stats knowing that all style points are an accumulation of the members teamed together and where entities fail, style prevails so it was no surprise that out the gate Santa Fe Style seemed to startle the pieces of area coded numerology with their cohesive southwestern fits and teaming dapper swag consisting of snake skin boots, big belt buckles and indigenous motifs etched on wool ponchos. "The Tournament" MVP TJ Sanchez once again showed off the swag like a turquoise bolo tie at a wedding leading all scorers with 26pts, 5rebs, 5 dimes and 3 thefts. Oliver "Young" Fell was big style personified in a 10-gallon stetson perched on a fresh fade with 18pts, 6rebs, 2 dimes and 3 swats. All Tourney selection Lukas "My Turn" Turner capped off an impressive season as he led the five hundred and five entities with 21pts, 4rebs and a dime. Juan Ortiz was a section of greatness at times adding 19pts in the 58-72 loss. Heck of a season and tourney 505 Unit, and big congrats to the summer champs and 3-peat winners Santa Fe Style!
See you all in September.
Respect the game, Santa Fe Swish
